Serving in the midst of grief

I've blogged before about the privilege it is to walk alongside folk through times of grief, but some times are more difficult than others. In September a young man in our community took his own life. He was 31 and for whatever reason had reached that point of despair that resulted in his choice to end his own life.

Today was his funeral. It was a quite affair. In many ways the people that attended were still struggling with the issues surrounding his death. You wouldn't expect them not be. His family are in South Africa, so today we said good-bye and committed his body to be cremated so that the ashes can be flown home.

His name was Aidon, and although I didn't know him very well at all, today I stood with his family and friends, both absent and present. Suicide is hard to comprehend and almost everyone I know who has been close to someone who has completed an attempt on their own life asks exactly the same question: Why didn't we see it coming?

I'm not sure you ever can. You can sometimes see the signs that they are vulnerable, but you rarely see the signs that today will be the day.

And what does God make of it? A friend of mine once suggested that he rather thought that God's response was to wonder why you'd arrived early. It was not meant to be trite or flippant. It was a serious attempt to say that he didn't think that God condemns a person because they reach such a point of despair that they see no other options. I tend to agree. 

Lord, may we be a place to which anyone can turn at any time. Let no one go unnoticed in our community. May we be a place where hope, faith and love are lived out and open for discovery.